I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I don't deserve a penis
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
