So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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