You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
