She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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