I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
