tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Randomize
