wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize