do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
