I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
