Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I wish my penis had an off switch
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
