Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
