My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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