is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
