I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
