He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
