You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
