Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
