yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
