Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
