When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
You were trust falling into bushes
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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