I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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