Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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