So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
This house was built for laser tag.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
