he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
