at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
