you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
