Duck Duck Cougar?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
