with your own penis?
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
