I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize