He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Randomize
