Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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