wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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