Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
