But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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