It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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