girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
And then he peed in my hair
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
