People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Man, jail baloney is awful.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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