when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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