I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm like, not good at living.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
