turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
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