Now he's lighting his socks on fire
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
You are a genius and a whore.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
