worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
