everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
