And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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