remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
My liver just had a heart attack.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
