This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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