I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
