haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
