"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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