I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize